New Research Indicates Doing Household Chores May Turn Men Gay
ISTANBUL (The Global Edition) – Years of doing chores around the house, including ironing, dishwashing, vacuuming and dusting, could turn heterosexual men gay, according to the results of a study headed by Dr. Kareem Ongyz, Turkey’s most famous sexologist from the University of Istanbul’s psychology department.
“For decades we’ve known that doing household chores could lead to the weakening of a man’s libido and sexual confidence, which manifested itself as poor performance in the bedroom. The research I have been conducting for the past twelve months indicates that the problem is not of a physical nature, but rather a medical one, because doing a female’s chores for several months decreases the testosterone levels in a man’s body. The only cure is to avoid any similar activities for an extended period of time,” Dr. Ongyz said.
According to the results of Dr. Ongyz’s study, symptoms include a lack of sexual desire, which is often misinterpreted by men as everyday fatigue. Furthermore, the psychologist claims that upon hearing that a man is tired because he was busy doing chores all day, a woman loses her sexual desire for the man as well. Rejected women will eventually stop attempting to initiate intercourse, leaving their partners no other option but to explore their sexuality on their own.
“Let’s take some ordinary activity, say dishwashing, as an example. For a while, a man does the dishes, and at a certain point, his wife realizes that the skin on his hands is beginning to get dry, so she buys him some moisturizing hand cream. Though the man will often refuse such offers in the beginning, eventually he will come to like the smell, and begin noticing the cream’s soothing effects on his skin. In the next phase, he realizes that there are other moisturizing hand creams out there, some even better smelling. He starts exploring. Not long after that, he discovers lip balm. I think you understand where all of this is going,” Dr. Ongyz said. The psychologist noted that taking out the trash was the only exception his study could find to the rule, and the only household chore that doesn’t result in any sexual changes in men, because it contains the sporty, basketball-like motion of thrusting a bag into an open container, an act in which certain sexual connotations can be found.