Dentist who Killed the Lion Claims Cecil was Member of ISIS

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MINNESOTA, USA (The Global Edition) – The American dentist from Minnesota who hunted down and killed a beloved lion in Zimbabwe now claims that the lion he killed, named Cecil, was a member of ISIS, a jihadi extremist militant group and self-proclaimed caliphate and Islamic state. “I know many people are upset because I killed the lion, but More...

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By The Global Edition On Tuesday, September 16th, 2014
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Scientists: World Faces Certain Doom If Humanity Continues to Blah Blah Blah

GENEVA (The Global Edition) – A new scientific report from the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) indicates, in no uncertain terms, that the entire planet’s fate depends on humanity ending its More...

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By The Global Edition On Thursday, August 21st, 2014
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Dozens of Celebrities Die of Pneumonia After Performing ALS Ice Bucket Challenge

UNITED STATES (The Global Edition) – Vanilla Ice, Jeff Goldblum, Will Ferrell, John Goodman, Celine Dion, Jerry Springer are just some of the celebrities who caught pneumonia and died after performing the More...

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By The Global Edition On Thursday, April 10th, 2014
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Selfies Gradually Lengthening Human Arms, Study Finds

BOSTON (The Global Edition) – Scientists from Harvard University claim they have found an indisputable proof that human arms have become longer since man began taking selfies. The discovery was made by accident More...

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By The Global Edition On Sunday, November 17th, 2013
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U.S. Institutes Strict 1 Man-Child Policy

WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Global Edition) – Facing a dangerously high concentration of developmentally arrested males in the populace, the United States government today announced the implementation of a strict 1 More...

tesla roadster
By The Global Edition On Wednesday, May 15th, 2013
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Small-Dicked Environmentalist Purchases Tesla Roadster

SAN FRANCISCO (The Global Edition)– Jack Rodney (41) eco-house real estate agent with a below-average-size penis from San Francisco, USA, purchased a new model of Tesla roadster, sources report. Mr. Rodney More...

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By The Global Edition On Tuesday, May 14th, 2013
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Sci-Fi Author Envisions Alternate Reality Where He Has A Girlfriend

LOS ANGELES (The Global Edition) – Jeremy Douglas (37), a relatively unknown sci-fi writer has been stretching his imagination to ridiculous lengths in recent weeks trying to envision an alternate reality More...

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By The Global Edition On Friday, May 10th, 2013
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Blood-soaked Film Not Suited For Children Due to Nudity

LOS ANGELES, (The Global Edition) – US film censors have declared Europe’s latest hyper-violent gore feature “not suited for children” due to scenes that show female back nudity. The Culture More...

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By The Global Edition On Wednesday, May 8th, 2013
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Bob Dylan Acknowledges 50-Year-Long Hoax: My Lyrics Don’t Make Sense

Rock and roll legend, Bob Dylan, acknowledged in a recent interview that he has perpetuated an elaborate hoax on the public for more than fifty years. “I can’t sing, half of the time I don’t even More...

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By The Global Edition On Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
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Young Couple Furious At Baby For Not Fixing Relationship

SAN FRANCISCO, (The Global Edition) – Young San Francisco couple, George and May Stevens are furious with their newborn baby for not solving their relationship problems. May and George have had communications More...