Aztec Prediction That Mayans Would Be Wrong About The End Of The World Comes True
CLEVELAND (The Global Edition) – Lost amidst all of last week’s concern about the Mayan prediction about the end of the world was a contemporaneous prediction by the Aztecs that the Mayans are wrong and that the world would not be destroyed in 2012. The Prediction, translated from the original Nahuatl language said, “The Mayans are full of crap. We know when the world will end, and at the appropriate time we will reveal it. Until then, leave us alone.”
The audience at a packed lecture house at the University of Bangladesh at Cleveland, listened intently as Professor Tracy Uhnak spoke of the ancient Aztec predictions and lifestyle. “The Aztecs were a simple folk, perhaps best known for their mastery of the board game Risk. Young Aztecs were especially thrilled when they captured the Mayan or Incan land on the game board,” Dr. Uhnak said.
The Aztecs were also known for their uncanny predictions. “Many of these predictions were recorded by conquistadors such as Hernán Cortés, Bernal Díaz del Castillo and Ricky Ricardo,” the professor explained.
“It was the Aztecs who first saw the breakup of The Beatles,” she elaborated. “An ancient drawing on a cave wall has been translated to read, ‘singers who think they are Walrus, have fight over wives.’”
The Aztecs had many predictions for 2012. They predicted that a formerly great nation would be ruined when a person, that they described as “Man with Orange hair, combed backwards,” would take over leadership. His reign would be short lived, being deposed when he insisted that the entire nation wear their hair similarly. They predicted that in 2012 that same nation would fall. They were unclear what this nation would fall off, but the loose translation is “cliff”.
Historians have learned to take Aztec Predictions with considerable skepticism. “I figured that they were never wrong. So, based upon that, I put down my entire fortune on The New York Jets this year. I’ll never trust another Aztec,” said long suffering Aztec historian and Jets fan Mark Cersosimo.
By TGE correspondent Jello Marx